Pretending It's Fall (Read: Your Late September Lyric Swap)

It's that time of year again, folks when I start to get mad that it is still so stinking hot outside. (Emphasis on the stinking. And the hot.) I tell myself every year that I shouldn't expect it to really cool down (more than just mornings and evenings, anyway) until the end of October or beginning of November. And yet, every September when I want to start baking apple struesel muffins to celebrate the first day of "Fall," I can't help but shake my fist at the Universe that our highs here in Phoenix are still in the triple digits and will probably continue to be for the next few weeks at least. (But guess what? I make the muffins anyway. Take that, Universe.)

Rather than spend all my energy on fist shaking and what-not, I decided to put it towards a little lyric re-writing to say goodbye to summer. (You know, since I should probably conserve my energy for getting through the next couple of 105 degree days.) Even though summer is still not really over here,  and won't be for a while, I find that if I am going to survive, I need to believe that it will be soon.

So here, for your reading and/or singing pleasure, is "Pretend It's Fall" to be enjoyed to the tune of "Red Rubber Ball."

I've prayed and prayed you'd bid us farewell

It's going to be October soon, and it's still as hot as h@##

Now I know you're not the only season of the year

"The high today is 70," is all I want to hear

But I think it's gonna be alright.

Yeah, the worst is over now

It's time to make some pumpkin pie and pretend it's fall.

You never cared for the hours I've perspired

Your only job has been to make me sweaty, hot, and tired

Always scorching, never cooling, that's the way you are

When I pick up my kids from school, I can't turn off the car

But I think it's gonna be alright.

Yeah, the worst is over now

It's time to make some pumpkin pie and pretend it's fall.

You're not quite in the past, but you better get there soon

It's already 90 now and it's not even noon

These six long months of summertime are nearly at an end
The hundreds on electric bills is all we're going to spend

But I think it's gonna be alright.
Yeah, the worst is over now
It's time to make some pumpkin pie and pretend it's fall.

Oh, I think it's gonna be alright.
Yeah, the worst is over now
It's time to make some pumpkin pie and pretend it's fall.

(This post inspired by a "red rubber ball" sunrise that I recently enjoyed, and brought to you by Phoenix and its infamous six months of summer.)