This is to announce the passing of our young, once vibrant, Garbage Disposal. Garbage Disposal has been an important member of our family since late 2006, and we regret to inform the public that he is no longer with us.
After a brief encounter involving chicken parts, Garbage Disposal quickly succumbed to a short illness in which the vital grinding mechanisms were compromised. Valiant until the last, Garbage Disposal continued to work for us for some time despite horrifyingly guttural noises coming from the innermost depths of the sink. Early Wednesday evening, however, Garbage Disposal was unable to continue functioning. The guttural noises were replaced by a quiet hum, indicating that Garbage Disposal will grind no more.
Services for Garbage Disposal will be held this weekend, but due to space constraints, they will be limited to close family and friends.
Thank you, Garbage Disposal, for giving us a reason to keep food out of our trash and for helping to make our kitchen just a little bit less stinky. We'll miss you.
So sorry he didn't make it. I was really pulling for him. I won't be able to make it for the services, but where can I send the flowers and baking soda?
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