"Life...is arduous, difficult, a perpetual struggle. It calls for gigantic courage and strength." ~Virginia Woolf
Lately, in my spare time, when I haven't been making a meal or cleaning the house or wiping a bottom or taking someone to school or giving a bath or doing homework or sleeping, I've been thinking a lot. Not surprisingly, I've been thinking about being overwhelmed. (Didn't see that coming, did you?)
Admittedly, feeling overwhelmed is a generally unpleasant feeling, marked by anxiety, stress, fatigue, and a plethora of other yucky sentiments. And, with a million things going on at any given moment on any given day, it's not too hard imagine why one would begin to feel that way.
It seems, as women, we don't like admitting that we have arrived at a state of overwhelmed-ness. (Not a word, but I choose not to be overwhelmed by that fact.) We like giving people the good news when they ask how we are: "I'm doing pretty good," "I'm hanging in there," "We're getting by," etc. etc. etc. Not wanting to overwhelm other people (or ourselves) with the facts of our lives, sometimes we layer the good over the bad, even though we might be struggling.
Now, this is not a call for all women everywhere to wear their hearts on their sleeves, and share every intimate deal or difficulty of their lives (although, I say, do it if you feel like it). Just a little reminder that sometimes life is stinky, and it's okay to feel overwhelmed by it all. Here's why:
~A lot is asked of us...to comfort, to help, to spend time, to wake up early (my personal nemesis), to perform on some level or other.
~Sometimes we don't feel well. Our bodies have limitations and that is not always an easy thing to swallow. Our mood (and desire to conquer the world) can be really easily effected by how we feel physically.
~We have to live with disappointments. Plans change, people fail us, and sometimes our lives feel like they are going in the wrong direction altogether, and not because of anything we have done to warrant it.
~The to-do list is never ending. Basically, it will never be complete. Or, if it is, we have to start a new one over the next day anyway.
~The ratio of hours in the day to things that need to get done is abysmally insignificant.
(I hope I haven't overwhelmed anyone who was not already feeling overwhelmed...uh, you guys can just scroll down to the next post.)
Yep. Life is hard. Go ahead and feel overwhelmed by it all. Go ahead and say, "Oh, my holy Hannah, I don't think I can do this right now." And then go ahead and do it anyway. Because you are courageous and strong. And being overwhelmed doesn't mean that you can't still kick trash.
Monson Fonsons
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Heavens to Lexy, Guess Who's One?
One year ago, this was going on...
And then, POOF! This cute baby appeared:
Feeling quite unsure of how this tiny newborn turned into a full-blown one-year-old, I visited the computer archives for evidence. Sure enough, she did it little by little by little. (Too bad I didn't realize until now that someone has been pressing the fast forward button on my life.) Here it is, proof positive that babies grow up way too fast.
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
Lex's first birthday, February 1, 2011
Only a few short month's remain in Lexa's squishy babyhood, during which time I will hold her and squeeze her and love her as much as she will let me.
Happy Birthday, babykins, try to slow it down a little, will ya?
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
The Case of the Missing Coupons (a.k.a "I Must be Losing My Mind")
Yesterday, in a very rare moment, I found approximately one extra minute of time in the mad rush to get J ready for school and out the door. So, in the interest of efficiency, I thought I would do a tiny bit of planning ahead and set aside the coupons I would need for my morning trip to Target. I went to grab my coupon file out of my purse and, lo and behold, it wasn't there. I looked around for a bit and it was no where to be found...not in my purse, not in the car, not in the hall closet where I hang my purse up.
By now, the one minute (along with a few others) is long gone and we're suddenly behind schedule, so I commence barking orders at the girls to get us going as soon as possible. I will admit, I threw a mini-tantrum in frustration over the missing coupons. As I'm yelling at the girls to get their shoes on and get in the car, what's really going through my head is "Why on earth can I not keep track of my stuff" or (even worse) "Why, oh why can't other people leave my stuff alone?"
I didn't find the coupons, we were late getting to school, and it was raining so I decided not to go to Target anyway. Grrrr.
Today, still no sign of them, and I am running out of places to look. I figure any of the following scenarios are possible:
-I left them at a store.
-I took them out of my purse to add a coupon, and forgot to put them back.
-The girls got them out and were playing with them.
-Craig saw them laying around somewhere and put them in a "safe" place for me.
-On my way to putting them away, I set them down in some random place which I can neither remember nor locate at this time.
Sadly, none of these scenarios is unlikely, which makes it all the more difficult to narrow them down to one or two possibilities.
After today's trip to Target (in which, couponless, I spent about $6 more than I should have had to) I re-started the search. In exasperation, I said out loud, "where are those coupons?"
Then Savanna gave me a nibble. "Julia put them in her bed." Seriously? "She had them in your room?" I asked. "Yes, she had them in her bed. Then she put them under my bed." I was a little skeptical, but what the heck. "If you help me find them," I told her, "I'll give you a dollar." A thorough search revealed that the coupons were not in Julia's bed, nor under Savanna's bed, nor anywhere in their room. By the time Savanna started suggesting that Alexa hid them, or a monster had taken them, I started figuring out that, cute and helpful though she is, she is not a reliable witness. "Do I get my dollar now?" Uh, negatory.
Just like the blanket saga, as much as I wish this story had a happy ending, the coupons remain at large. I figure by the time I get around to buying a new file and get stocked up on coupons again, they will show up somewhere like the garage freezer or under the bathroom sink (as of now, two of the only places that I haven't looked).
And for those of you out there in blog-land, if you happen to know where my coupons are, I'll give you a dollar for their safe return. Either that or your choice of 3 coupons totaling no more than $1.50. The choice is yours.
By now, the one minute (along with a few others) is long gone and we're suddenly behind schedule, so I commence barking orders at the girls to get us going as soon as possible. I will admit, I threw a mini-tantrum in frustration over the missing coupons. As I'm yelling at the girls to get their shoes on and get in the car, what's really going through my head is "Why on earth can I not keep track of my stuff" or (even worse) "Why, oh why can't other people leave my stuff alone?"
I didn't find the coupons, we were late getting to school, and it was raining so I decided not to go to Target anyway. Grrrr.
Today, still no sign of them, and I am running out of places to look. I figure any of the following scenarios are possible:
-I left them at a store.
-I took them out of my purse to add a coupon, and forgot to put them back.
-The girls got them out and were playing with them.
-Craig saw them laying around somewhere and put them in a "safe" place for me.
-On my way to putting them away, I set them down in some random place which I can neither remember nor locate at this time.
Sadly, none of these scenarios is unlikely, which makes it all the more difficult to narrow them down to one or two possibilities.
After today's trip to Target (in which, couponless, I spent about $6 more than I should have had to) I re-started the search. In exasperation, I said out loud, "where are those coupons?"
Then Savanna gave me a nibble. "Julia put them in her bed." Seriously? "She had them in your room?" I asked. "Yes, she had them in her bed. Then she put them under my bed." I was a little skeptical, but what the heck. "If you help me find them," I told her, "I'll give you a dollar." A thorough search revealed that the coupons were not in Julia's bed, nor under Savanna's bed, nor anywhere in their room. By the time Savanna started suggesting that Alexa hid them, or a monster had taken them, I started figuring out that, cute and helpful though she is, she is not a reliable witness. "Do I get my dollar now?" Uh, negatory.
Just like the blanket saga, as much as I wish this story had a happy ending, the coupons remain at large. I figure by the time I get around to buying a new file and get stocked up on coupons again, they will show up somewhere like the garage freezer or under the bathroom sink (as of now, two of the only places that I haven't looked).
And for those of you out there in blog-land, if you happen to know where my coupons are, I'll give you a dollar for their safe return. Either that or your choice of 3 coupons totaling no more than $1.50. The choice is yours.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
18 Holes is 14 Too Many
When my sister Cyndie and her family were here for New Year's, we went on a little trip to Amazing Jake's for some pizza buffet and arcade action. They had a mini-bowling alley that we wanted to try out, but the wait was pretty long so we opted for miniature golf instead.
We thought it would be fun. And it was. But with 5 adults and 4 kids playing, those 18 holes took forever. In fact, I'm pretty sure we are still playing right now...
We thought it would be fun. And it was. But with 5 adults and 4 kids playing, those 18 holes took forever. In fact, I'm pretty sure we are still playing right now...
Julia, Audrina, Zariah and Savanna,
gearing up for a never-ending adventure.
Not too much golf course etiquette going on here,but
we figured the doubling up would get us through faster.
It didn't really.
Julia having a Happy Gilmore moment.
Audrina in action.
It's all in the hips...
Savanna bringing up the rear.
Yes, Audrina, I know exactly how you feel.
The pink-jacketed little girl in the picture got tired of waiting for our large group and ended up cutting in front of us around hole 12, much to our chagrin. Then we got to wait for five kids instead of four. Yipp. Eee.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
The Good and Bad of "The Grass is Greener" Syndrome
My sister, Laura, said something the other day that got me thinking. She was sitting on the couch getting ready to grade papers for a college class she teaches. (Can you believe I'm a sister to someone who teaches college? I must be old. Or maybe just she is. But I digress.) As she was sitting there, she said, "This is so funny. Anytime I sit down to grade papers, I start thinking about something else I'd rather be doing, like vacuuming. Only, I know that if I had to vacuum, I would think of something else better to do, like read."
I don't know about you, but I operate on this exact same level. I often fantasize about how much uninterrupted housework I could get done if my kids were gone, but once they aren't around, I do not want to spend my time cleaning the house. I'd much rather read or nap or go to the store by myself.
This is what I call "the grass is greener" syndrome. Anytime I am faced with a task I don't want to do, I think of something I'd rather do instead...so, about 40 percent of the time, I wander on over to a different task, and the other 60 percent I push through and finish whatever I am in the middle of. It's a blessing and a curse.
The curse part is obvious--operating this way is clearly a very inefficient way to get anything done.
You have to dig a little deeper for the blessing part.
As I was putting laundry away today, (a very un-fun task for a fun girl like me) I looked up at the shelves in my closet and thought how much I wished I could get them better organized, and how much I wished I were doing that instead of the task at hand. And then the wheels started turning, and I realized: the only reason I wanted to get at those closet shelves was because they were different than what I was doing right then. If I had set out to do some closet cleaning in the first place, surely I would have thought of a better alternative, like taking out the trash or wiping off the bathroom counters. And it sort of made me think about how many things I get done because they sound better than the thing I am doing at a given moment. There are actually specific jobs that I only get done when I'm bored with something else, like rotating bins of the girls' clothes (when I'm in the middle of putting laundry away), or cleaning out my kitchen cupboards (when I'm in the middle of emptying the dishwasher), or sorting pantry items (when I'm in the middle of putting away groceries), just to name a few. It's a good thing I never set out to do these tasks, because if I did, they would never actually get finished; instead, I have to wander into them when I'm supposed to be doing something else.
So, there you have it. As inefficient as it is to wrecklessly abandon certain tasks in order to start doing something completely unrelated, at least I know that there are a few things that have to be done that way, otherwise they don't get done at all.
And that's the strange, hidden blessing.
I don't know about you, but I operate on this exact same level. I often fantasize about how much uninterrupted housework I could get done if my kids were gone, but once they aren't around, I do not want to spend my time cleaning the house. I'd much rather read or nap or go to the store by myself.
This is what I call "the grass is greener" syndrome. Anytime I am faced with a task I don't want to do, I think of something I'd rather do instead...so, about 40 percent of the time, I wander on over to a different task, and the other 60 percent I push through and finish whatever I am in the middle of. It's a blessing and a curse.
The curse part is obvious--operating this way is clearly a very inefficient way to get anything done.
You have to dig a little deeper for the blessing part.
As I was putting laundry away today, (a very un-fun task for a fun girl like me) I looked up at the shelves in my closet and thought how much I wished I could get them better organized, and how much I wished I were doing that instead of the task at hand. And then the wheels started turning, and I realized: the only reason I wanted to get at those closet shelves was because they were different than what I was doing right then. If I had set out to do some closet cleaning in the first place, surely I would have thought of a better alternative, like taking out the trash or wiping off the bathroom counters. And it sort of made me think about how many things I get done because they sound better than the thing I am doing at a given moment. There are actually specific jobs that I only get done when I'm bored with something else, like rotating bins of the girls' clothes (when I'm in the middle of putting laundry away), or cleaning out my kitchen cupboards (when I'm in the middle of emptying the dishwasher), or sorting pantry items (when I'm in the middle of putting away groceries), just to name a few. It's a good thing I never set out to do these tasks, because if I did, they would never actually get finished; instead, I have to wander into them when I'm supposed to be doing something else.
So, there you have it. As inefficient as it is to wrecklessly abandon certain tasks in order to start doing something completely unrelated, at least I know that there are a few things that have to be done that way, otherwise they don't get done at all.
And that's the strange, hidden blessing.
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